HOUSE OF SECRETS: THE BURARI DEATHS – Paranoia, control, tragedy

I love documentary series about all kinds of crimes. Many such productions can be found on Netflix, and I have to admit that most of them are really good. When I started watching House of Secrets: The Burari Deaths, at first I was convinced that I was watching another classic documentary in which investigators would recount in detail an unusual murder, but instead I got a terrifying story of an Indian family that died in disturbing circumstances.

The core of the matter, however, remains the same – if not for long-standing tradition, the three-generation family could still be alive today and nothing bad would have happened. The biggest mystery is quickly solved – the very first minutes explain whether we are dealing with a murder or a suicide. This does not interfere with the reception of the work, because the story itself is so complicated and twisted that it is no wonder that three hour-long episodes were needed to tell it.

The only thing I could really complain about is the lack of a clear message. Does the documentary draw attention to the problematic hierarchy of Indian society, or is the key to solving the case the lack of psychological help? Unfortunately, there is a bit of everything, and in the end we do not know what, in fact, should change so that such a tragedy never happens again.

And we must remember that 11 people died – a three-generation family. Despite the education of the youngest members, the family focused for 11 long years on rituals to bring happiness and prosperity to the home. The worst part of all this is that practically everyone allowed the head of the family – a madman with post-traumatic syndrome – to arrange their lives instead of opposing him. Unfortunately, culture and social hierarchy required this of them, determining who had a say in an Indian family.

When we listen to witnesses, everyone agrees that it was a normal family, like many in India. This raises the question: how many families experience psychological violence every day just because that is the unwritten law? It is hard to realize that this tragedy could have been avoided if only someone had been brave enough to resist. Unfortunately, they all went like sheep to the slaughter.

This is not a flawless documentary. I missed something more than just conspiracy theories around the number 11. I expected an in-depth analysis of Indian society, which to this day is governed by its own rules. It does, however, show the problems that modern Indian residents have to face and confirms what we have known for a long time – psychiatric and psychological care is in a deplorable state. Currently, in India, the narrative still prevails that only nutcases seek such help.

If, however, it were more accessible, it is possible that the family shown in the film would still be alive. It is possible that its members would have received the support and help they so desperately needed. The documentary also draws attention to one more important thing, just as relevant in the context of our country. There is a saying: do not tell anyone what happens at home. Unfortunately, we are closing ourselves off more and more from other people, not mentioning problems, not paying attention to warning signs.

And then most neighbors, faced with a tragedy, are surprised that he was such a good boy and hardly drank at all. That is the case here as well. Fear of possible punishment or – God forbid – the loss of further prosperity for the family is stronger than common sense, which dictates telling someone what has been happening in this particular home for 11 years.

It is also the perpetrator’s fear that when the daughter – after entering into an arranged marriage – moves to her husband’s house, she will tell him what happened in her family home. That is why no one could be left alive – the secret had to be kept at all costs.

Although the documentary says absolutely nothing new about the condition of Indian society, it is thought-provoking, showing that the perfect family is not always perfect. That behind closed doors real, irrational dramas can take place. One might think that since the whole case happened more than 5,000 kilometers away from us, it is not worth worrying about. Unfortunately, we still live in a patriarchal society that fears the word psychologist like fire.

There is a widespread belief that a real man does not cry, does not ask for help, and hides his problems. It is hard for me to judge someone who, on the one hand, wanted to play well the role assigned to him by society, but, due to mental health problems, sank into deeper and deeper paranoia, hurting his loved ones. I think this production is a good warning for all of us.